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Chapter 32 Containing an Answer to the Love-letter

Alice had had a week allowed to write her answer; but she sent it off before the full week was past. “Why should I keep him in suspense?” she said. “If it is to be so, there can be no good in not saying so at once.” Then she thought, also, that if this were to be her destiny it might be well for Mr Grey that all his doubts on the matter should be dispelled. She had treated him badly — very badly. She had so injured him that the remembrance of the injury must always be a source of misery to her; but she owed to him above everything to let him know what were her intentions as soon as they were settled. She tried to console herself by thinking that the wound to him would be easy of cure. “He also is not passionate,” she said. But in so saying she deceived herself. He was a man in whom Love could be very passionate — and was, moreover, one in whom Love could hardly be renewed.

Each morning Kate asked her whether her answer was written; and on the third day after Christmas, just before dinner, Alice said that she had written it, and that it was gone.

“But it isn’t post-day,” said Kate — for the post illuminated Vavasor but three days a week.

“I have given a boy sixpence to take it to Shap,” said Alice blushing.

“And what have you said?” asked Kate, taking hold of the other’s arm.

“I have kept my promise,” said Alice; “and do you keep yours by asking no further questions.”

“My sister — my own sister,” said Kate. And then, as Alice met her embrace, there was no longer any doubt as to the nature of the reply.

After this there was of course much close discussion between them as to what other steps should now be taken. Kate wanted her cousin to write immediately to Mr Grey, and was somewhat frightened when Alice declined to do so till she had received a further letter from George. “You have not proposed any horrid stipulations to him?” exclaimed Kate. “I don’t know what you may call horrid stipulations,” said Alice, gravely. “My conditions have not been very hard, and I do not think you would have disapproved them.”

“But he! — He is so impetuous! Will he disapprove them?”

“I have told him. — But, Kate, this is just what I did not mean to tell you.”

“Why should there be secrets between us?” said Kate.

“There shall be none, then. I have told him that I cannot bring myself to marry him instantly — that he must allow me twelve months to wear off if I can in that time, much of sadness and of self-reproach which has fallen to my lot.”

“Twelve months, Alice?”

“Listen to me. I have said so. But I have told him also that if he wishes it still, I will at once tell papa and grandpapa that I hold myself as engaged to him, so that he may know that I bind myself to him as far as it is possible that I should do so. And I have added something else, Kate,” she continued to say after a slight pause — “something else which I can tell you, though I could tell it to no other person. I can tell you because you would do, and will do the same. I have told him that any portion of my money is at his service which may be needed for his purposes before that twelve months is over.”

“Oh, Alice! No — no. You shall not do that. It is too generous.” And Kate perhaps felt at the moment that her brother was a man to whom such an offer could hardly be made with safety.

“But I have done it. Mercury, with sixpence in his pocket, is already posting my generosity at Shap. And, to tell the truth, Kate, it is no more than fair. He has honestly told me that while the old Squire lives he will want my money to assist him in a career of which I do much more than approve. It has been my earnest wish to see him in Parliament. It will now be the most earnest desire of my heart — the one thing as to which I shall feel an intense anxiety. How then can I have the face to bid him wait twelve months for that which is specially needed in six months’ time? It would be like the workhouses which are so long in giving bread, that in the mean time the wretches starve.”

“But the wretch shan’t starve,” said Kate. “My money, small as it is, will carry him over this bout. I have told him that he shall have it, and that I expect him to spend it. Moreover, I have no doubt that Aunt Greenow would lend me what he wants.”

“But I should not wish him to borrow from Aunt Greenow. She would advance him the money, as you say, upon stamped paper, and then talk of it.”

“He shall have mine,” said Kate.

“And who are you?” said Alice, laughing. “You are not going to be his wife?”

“He shall not touch your money till you are his wife,” said Kate, very seriously. “I wish you would consent to change your mind about this stupid tedious year, and then you might do as you pleased. I have no doubt such a settlement might be made as to the property here, when my grandfather hears of it, as would make you ultimately safe.”

“And do you think I care to be ultimately safe, as you call it? Kate, my dear, you do not understand me.”

“I suppose not. And yet I thought that I had known something about you.”

“It is because I do not care for the safety of which you speak that I am now going to become your brother’s wife. Do you suppose that I do not see that I must run much risk?”

“You prefer the excitement of London to the tranquility, may I say, of Cambridgeshire.”

“Exactly — and therefore I have told George that he shall have my money whenever he wants it.”

Kate was very persistent in her objection to this scheme till George’s answer came. His answer to Alice was accompanied by a letter to his sister, and after that Kate said nothing more about the money question. She said no more then; but it must not therefore be supposed that she was less determined than she had been that no part of Alice’s fortune should be sacrificed to her brother’s wants — at any rate before Alice should become her brother’s wife. But her brother’s letter for the moment stopped her mouth. It would be necessary that she should speak to him before she again spoke to Alice.

In what words Alice had written her assent it will be necessary that the reader should know, in order that something may be understood of the struggle which she made upon the occasion; but they shall be given presently, when I come to speak of George Vavasor’s position as he received them. George’s reply was very short and apparently very frank. He deprecated the delay of twelve months, and still hoped to be able to induce her to be more lenient to him. He advised her to write to Mr Grey at once — and as regarded the Squire he gave her carte blanche to act as she pleased. If the Squire required any kind of apology, expression of sorrow — any asking for pardon, or such like, he, George, would, under the circumstances as they now existed, comply with the requisition most willingly. He would regard it as a simple form, made necessary by his coming marriage. As to Alice’s money, he thanked her heartily for her confidence. If the nature of his coming contest at Chelsea should make it necessary, he would use her offer as frankly as it had been made. Such was his letter to Alice. What was contained in his letter to Kate, Alice never knew.

Then came the business of telling this new love tale — the third which poor Alice had been forced to tell her father and grandfather — and a grievous task it was. In this matter she feared her father much more than her grandfather, and therefore she resolved to tell her grandfather first — or, rather, she determined that she would tell the Squire, and that in the mean time Kate should talk to her father.

“Grandpapa,” she said to him the morning after she had received her cousin’s second letter. — The old man was in the habit of breakfasting alone in a closet of his own, which was called his dressing-room, but in which he kept no appurtenances for dressing, but in lieu of them a large collection of old spuds and sticks and horse’s-bits. There was a broken spade here, and a hoe or two; and a small table in the corner was covered with the debris of tradesmen’s bills from Penrith, and dirty scraps which he was wont to call his farm accounts — “Grandpapa,” said Alice, rushing away at once into the middle of her subject, “you told me the other day that you thought I ought to be — married.”

“Did I, my dear? Well, yes; so I did. And so you ought — I mean to that Mr Grey.”

“That is impossible, sir.”

“Then what’s the use of your coming and talking to me about it?”

This made Alice’s task not very easy; but, nevertheless, she persevered. “I am come, grandpapa, to tell you of another engagement.”

“Another!” said he. And by the tone of his voice he accused his granddaughter of having a larger number of favoured suitors than ought to fall to the lot of any young lady. It was very hard upon her, but still she went on.

“You know,” said she, “that some years ago I was to have been married to my cousin George;” — and then she paused.

“Well,” said the old man.

“And I remember you told me then that you were much pleased.”

“So I was. Geor............

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