The Battle of Arbroath, and Other Warlike Matters.  
“It was in the year 1445—that’s not far short o’ four hundred years ago—ah! tempus fugit, which is a Latin quotation, my girl, from Horace Walpole, I believe, an’ signifies time and tide waits for no man; that’s what they calls a free translation, you must know; well, it was in the winter o’ 1445 that a certain Alexander Ogilvy of Inverquharity, was chosen to act as Chief Justiciar in these parts—I suppose that means a kind of upper bailiff, a sort o’ bo’s’n’s mate, to compare great things with small. He was set up in place of one o’ the Lindsay family, who, it seems, was rather extravagant, though whether his extravagance lay in wearin’ a beard (for he was called Earl Beardie), or in spendin’ too much cash, I can’t take upon me for to say. Anyhow, Beardie refused to haul down his colours, so the Ogilvys mustered their men and friends, and the Lindsays did the same, and they went at it, hammer and tongs, and fowt what ye may call the Battle of Arbroath, for it was close to the old town where they fell to.
 
“It was a most bloody affair. The two families were connected with many o’ the richest and greatest people in the land, and these went to lend a hand when they beat to quarters, and there was no end o’ barbed horses, as they call them—which means critters with steel spikes in their noses, I’m told—and lots of embroidered banners and flags, though I never heard that anyone hoisted the union Jack; but, however that may be, they fowt like bluejackets, for five hundred men were left dead on the field, an’ among them a lot o’ the great folk.
 
“But I’m sorry to say that the Ogilvys were licked, though I say it that shouldn’t,” continued the captain, with a sigh, as he relighted his pipe. “Howsever,—
 
    “‘Never ventur’, never win,
 
    Blaze away an’ don’t give in,’
 
“As Milton remarks in his preface to the Pilgrim’s Progress.”
 
“True, captain,” said the lieutenant, “and you know that he who fights and runs away, shall live to fight another day.”
 
“Leftenant,” said the captain gravely, “your quotation, besides bein’ a kind o’ desecration, is not applicable; ’cause the Ogilvys did not run away. They fowt on that occasion like born imps, an’ they would ha’ certainly won the day, if they hadn’t been, every man jack of ’em, cut to pieces before the battle was finished.”
 
“Well said, uncle,” exclaimed Ruby, with a laugh. “No doubt the Ogilvys would lick the Lindsays now if they had a chance.”
 
“I believe they would,” said the lieutenant, “for they have become a race of heroes since the great day of the Battle of Arbroath. No doubt, Miss Gray,” continued the lieutenant, turning to Minnie with an arch smile, “no doubt you have heard of that more recent event, the threatened attack on Arbroath by the French fire-eater, Captain Fall, and the heroic part played on that occasion by an Ogilvy—an uncle, I am told, of my good friend here?”
 
“I have heard of Captain Fall, of course,” replied Minnie, “for it was not many years before I was born that his visit took place, and Mrs Brand has often told me of the consternation into which the town was thrown by his doings; but I never heard of the deeds of the Ogilvy to whom you refer.”
 
“No? Now, that is surprising! How comes it, captain, that you have kept so silent on this subject?”
 
“’Cause it ain’t true,” replied the captain stoutly, yet with a peculiar curl about the corners of his mouth, that implied something in the mind beyond what he expressed with the lips.
 
“Ah! I see—modesty,” said Lindsay. “Your uncle is innately modest, Miss Gray, and never speaks of anything that bears the slightest resemblance to boasting. See, the grave solemnity with which he smokes while I say this proves the truth of my assertion. Well, since he has never told you, I will tell yell myself. You have no objection, captain?”
 
The captain sent a volume of smoke from his lips, and followed it up with— “Fire away, shipmet.”
 
The lieutenant, having drawn a few whiffs in order to ensure the continued combustion of his pipe, related the following anecdote, which is now matter of history, as anyone may find by consulting the archives of Arbroath.
 
“In the year 1781, on a fine evening of the month of May, the seamen of Arbroath who chanced to be loitering about the harbour observed a strange vessel manoeuvring in the offing. They watched and commented on the motions of the stranger with considerable interest, for the wary skill displayed by her commander proved that he was unacquainted with the navigation of the coast, and from the cut of her jib they knew that the craft was a foreigner. After a time she took up a position, and cast anchor in the bay, directly opposite the town.
 
“At that time we were, as we still are, and as it really appears likely to me we ever shall be, at war with France; but as the scene of the war was far removed from Arbroath, it never occurred to the good people that the smell of powder could reach their peaceful town. That idea was somewhat rudely forced upon them when the French flag was run up to the mizzentop, and a white puff of smoke burst from the vessel, which was followed by a shot, that went hissing over their heads, and plumped right into the middle of the town!
 
“That shot knocked over fifteen chimney-pots and two weathercocks in Market-gate, went slap through a house in the suburbs, and finally stuck in the carcass of an old horse belonging to the Provost of the town, which didn’t survive the shock—the horse, I mean, not the Provost.
 
“It is said that there was an old gentleman lying in bed in a room of the house that the shot went through. He was a sort of ‘hipped’ character, and believed that he could not walk, if he were to try ever so much. He was looking quietly at the face of a great Dutch clock when the shot entered and knocked the clock inside out, sending its contents in a shower over the old gentleman, who jumped up and rushed out of the house like a maniac! He was cured completely from that hour. At least, so it’s said, but I don’t vouch for the truth of the story.
 
“However, certain it is that the shot was fired, and was followed up by two or three more; after which the Frenchman ceased firing, and a boat was seen to quit the side of the craft, bearing a flag of truce.
 
“The consternation into which the town was thrown is said to have been tremendous.”
 
“That’s false,” interrupted the captain, removing his pipe while he spoke. “The word ain’t appropriate. The men of Arbroath doesn’t know nothin’ about no such word as ‘consternation.’ They was surprised, if ye choose, an’ powerfully enraged mayhap, but they wasn’t consternated by no means.”
 
“Well, I don’t insist on the point,” said the lieutenant, “but chroniclers write so—
 
“Chroniclers write lies sometimes,” interrupted the captain curtly.
 
“Perhaps they do; but you will admit, I dare say, that the women and children were thrown into a great state of alarm.”
 
“I’m not so sure of that,” interposed Ruby. “In a town where the men were so bold, the women and children would be apt to feel very much at their ease. At all events, I am acquainted with some women who are not easily frightened.”
 
“Really, I think it is not fair to interrupt the story in this way,” said Minnie, with a laugh.
 
“Right, lass, right,” said the captain. “Come, leftenant, spin away at yer yarn, and don’t ventur’ too much commentary thereon, ’cause it’s apt to lead to error, an’ ye know, as the poet says—
 
    “‘Errors in the heart breed errors in the brain,
 
    An’ these are apt to twist ye wrong again.’
 
“I’m not ’xactly sure o’ the precise words in this case, but that’s the sentiment, and everybody knows that sentiment is everything in poetry, whether ye understand it or not. Fire away, leftenant, an’ don’t be long-winded if ye can help it.”
 
“Well, to return to the point,” resumed Lindsay. “The town was certainly thrown into a tremendous state of some sort, for the people had no arms of any kind wherewith to defend themselves. There were no regular soldiers, no militia, and no volunteers. Everybody ran wildly about in every direction, not knowing what to do. There was no leader, and, in short, the town was very like a shoal of small fish in a pool when a boy wades in and makes a dash amongst them.
 
“At last a little order was restored by the Provost, who was a sensible old man, and an old soldier to boot, but too infirm to take as active a part in such an emergency as he would have done had he been a dozen years younger. He, with several of the principal men of the town, went down to the beach to receive the bearers of the flag of truce.
 
“The boat was manned by a crew of five or six seamen, armed with cutlasses and arquebusses. As soon as its keel grated on the sand a smart little officer leaped ashore, and presented to the Provost a letter from Captain Fall, which ran somewhat in this fashion:—
 
“‘At Sea, May twenty-third.
 
“‘Gentlemen,—I send these two words to inform you, that I will have you to bring-to the French colour in less than a quarter of an hour, or I set the town on fire directly. Such is the order of my master, the King of France, I am sent by. Send directly the Mair and chiefs of the town to make some agreement with me, or I’ll make my duty. It is the will of yours,— G. Fall.
 
“‘To Monsieur Mair of the town called Arbrought, or in his absence to the chief man after him in Scotland.’
 
“On reading this the Provost bowed respectfully to the officer, and begged of him to wait a few minutes while he should consult with his chief men. This was agreed to, and the Provost said to his friends, as he walked to a neighbouring house—
 
“‘Ye see, freens, this whipper-snapper o’ a tade-eater has gotten the whup hand o’ us; but we’ll be upsides wi’ him. The main thing is to get delay, so cut away, Tam Cargill, and tak’ horse to Montrose for the sodgers. Spare na the spur, lad, an’ gar them to understan’ that the case is urgent.’
 
“While Tam Cargill started away on his mission, the Provost, whose chief aim was to gain time and cause delay, penned an epistle to the Frenchman, in which he stated that he had neglected to name the terms on which he would consent to spare the town, and that he would consider it extremely obliging if he would, as speedily as possible, return an answer, stating them, in order that they might be laid before the chief men of the place.”
 
“When the Provost, who was a grave, dignified old man, with a strong dash of humour in him, handed this note to the French officer, he did so with a humble obeisance that appeared to afford much gratification to the little man. As the latter jumped into the boat and ordered the men to push off, the Provost turned slowly to his brother magistrates with a wink and a quiet smile that convulsed them with suppressed laughter, and did more to encourage any of the wavering or timid inhabitants than if he had harangued them heroically for an hour.
 
“Some time after the boat returned with a reply, which ran thus:—
 
“‘At Sea, eight o’clock in the Afternoon.’
 
“‘Gentlemen,—I received just now your answer, by which you say I ask no terms. I thought it was useless, since I asked you to come aboard for agreement. But here are my terms:— I will have 30,000 pounds sterling at least, and six of the chiefs men of the town for otage. Be speedy, or I shot your town away directly, and I set fire to it. I am, gentlemen, your servant,— G. Fall.
 
“‘I sent some of my crew to you, but if some harm happens to them, you’ll be sure we’ll hang up the mainyard all the prisoners we have aboard.
 
“‘To Monsieurs the chiefs men of Arbroug............