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Chapter 12

 Eileen's next place was--as if by contrast--with a much more genteel family, and a much poorer, though it flew higher socially. It lived in a house, half in a fashionable London terrace, half in a shabby side street, and its abode was typical of its ambitions and its means. Mrs. Lee Carter drew the line clearly between herself and her governess, which was a blessing, for it meant Eileen's total exclusion from her social life, and Eileen's consequent enjoyment of her own evenings at home or abroad, as she wished. This unusual freedom compensated for the hard work of teaching children in various stages of growth and ignorance how to talk French and play the piano. Her salary was small, for Mrs. Lee Carter's ambition to live beyond her neighbours' means was only achieved by pinching whomever she could. She was not bad-hearted; she simply could not afford anything but luxuries. Eileen wondered at not being asked sometimes to perform at her parties, till she found that only celebrities ever did anything in that house.

 
This was a period of much mental activity in Eileen's life. The tossing ocean of London life, the theatres that played Shakespeare, the world of new books and new thought, her recent perusal of Plato and of man, all produced fermentation. But every night she knelt by her bedside and said her "Ave Maria" with a voluptuous sense of spiritual peace, and every morning she woke with a certain joy in existence and a certain surprise to find herself again existing. Her old convent-thought recurred. "We are worked from without--marionettes who can watch their own performance. And it is very amusing." Once she read of a British action in Afghanistan against border-tribes, and she wondered if Lieutenant Doherty was in the fighting. Since she had ceased to be his mother-confessor he had become very shadowy; his image now rose substantial from the newspaper lines, and she was surprised to find in herself a little palpitation at his probable perils. "One's heartstrings, too, are pulled," she thought. "I don't like it. Marionettes should move, not feel." These reflections, however, came to her more often anent her family, and the struggles of her kin for a livelihood touched her more deeply than any love. "We are like bits of the same shattered body," she thought. "In these cold English families everybody is another body." She sent most of her salary to Ireland, and her pocket-money came from singing in the choir on Sunday.
 
The bass chorister was a very amusing man. His voice was sepulchral but his conversation skittish. Eileen's repartees smote him to almost the only serious respect of his life, and one day he said: "Why, there's a future in you. Why don't you go on the stage?"
 
"What nonsense!" But the blood was secretly stirred in her veins. She saw herself walking along the Black Hole with the programme-girl, but her point of view had been modified since she had received a similar suggestion with a shudder. If she could play Rosalind to a great London audience, the staring men-folk would matter little.
 
"Why not?" went on the bass tempter. "A humour like yours with such a voice and such a face!"
 
"The stage is full of better voices and better faces."
 
"No, indeed. Why, there isn't a girl at the Half-and-Half--" He stopped and almost blushed.
 
She smiled. "Oh, I don't mind your going to such places. What is the Half-and-Half, a place where they drink beer?"
 
"Oh, it's just our slang name for a little music-hall that's just between the East End and the West End, with a corresponding programme."
 
"Our slang name?"
 
"Well--" he paused. "If you'll keep it very dark--but of course you will--I appear there myself."
 
"You! What do you do?"
 
"I sing patriotic songs and drinking-songs--"
 
"Aren't they the same thing in England?"
 
"Don't say that on the stage or they'll throw pewter pots. They're very patriotic."
 
"That's just what I said. What's your name--I suppose you change it?"
 
"Yes--as I hope you will yours--some day."
 
"I shan't take yours."
 
"Nobody arxed you, miss," he said. "And............
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