Whether you're trying to make a sale, get a date or wangle out of a traffic ticket, you need to establish rapport. Sometimes rapport just happens naturally and you've no clue why, The job gets done, the conversation flows, the cop tears up theticket. But how often have you found yourself in asituation where, no matter how hard you try, youjust can't seem to connect with another person—and it makes no sense? After all, you know you're afine, decent human being. Maybe you're even a fabu-lous, wildly attractive human being. But no matterwhat you say or do, you don't establish rapport andyou can't connect.

You're not alone. Being a decent sort is not enoughto guarantee good rapport with another person. In thedictionary, "rapport" is defined as "harmonious or27sympathetic communication." In our interpersonalcommunications, we go through certain routines whenwe first meet a new person. If these routines work outand rapport is established, we can begin to deliver ourcommunication with some certa............